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April 30, 2008

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Comments

Kelly Kreis

I posted your critique on my blog.

James

Andrew, your paper is interesting and there are a lot of facts that I did not know about. I would like for you to be a little bit clearer on your argument and what points you were trying to make. However, you seem focused on your topic to the point where you know more than anyone else in the school, probably. I think that this is a good paper and that you should get a decent grade for it.
Your transition is good and it kept the subject flowing. I liked how you explained everything on each topic and I also liked how you kept the information simple and to the point. I would work on typos and using punctuation a little too much. Also, your choice of words in a few places seems strange. But I still liked your paper.

James Mehr

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